Dear Prince,
The artist currently known as Prince has been through alot lately. He has changed his name a few times, and nobody really understood why, or even knew what to call him for a while. He finally changed his name back, and left people wondering what he is going to do next to draw attention to himself. I thought he may need some help with this, so I wrote him this letter.... ENJOY!!
Dear Prince,
I have been following your ploy to draw attention to yourself by changing your name repeatedly, and I must say- well played. You single-handedly proved that a rose beside any other name does NOT smell as sweet. The world now knows that extenuating circumstances such as rampant drug use or sweaty multi-sexual lovemaking can prevent the rose from smelling at all.
All roses aside, I think that you are great at drawing attention to yourself, and I would like to contribute to your cause. Here is a list of some other ideas that will help draw the attention of the general public:
-Start yourself on fire. Sure, Michael Jackson did it already, but not on purpose. If you become the first musician to purposely light yourself on fire, you will be more famous than you ever imagined.
-Protest in support of George W. Bush. It's never been done before. Enough said.
-Change your name again, but this time change it to be the same as someone famous like Arnold Schwarzenner or Oprah. The ensuing law suit will draw more attention than you ever dreamed of.
-Give me a million dollars for no reason at all. Think of the publicity!! The news would report it for months. I get excited just thinking about how much you would benefit from doing this.
-Make some good music. I know, it sounds weird, but you would be surprised what it can do for your career.
No need to thank me for these great ideas, just remember that I am available as a personal image consultant if you need any more help.
Awaiting your reply,
J-Roc
Dear Prince,
I have been following your ploy to draw attention to yourself by changing your name repeatedly, and I must say- well played. You single-handedly proved that a rose beside any other name does NOT smell as sweet. The world now knows that extenuating circumstances such as rampant drug use or sweaty multi-sexual lovemaking can prevent the rose from smelling at all.
All roses aside, I think that you are great at drawing attention to yourself, and I would like to contribute to your cause. Here is a list of some other ideas that will help draw the attention of the general public:
-Start yourself on fire. Sure, Michael Jackson did it already, but not on purpose. If you become the first musician to purposely light yourself on fire, you will be more famous than you ever imagined.
-Protest in support of George W. Bush. It's never been done before. Enough said.
-Change your name again, but this time change it to be the same as someone famous like Arnold Schwarzenner or Oprah. The ensuing law suit will draw more attention than you ever dreamed of.
-Give me a million dollars for no reason at all. Think of the publicity!! The news would report it for months. I get excited just thinking about how much you would benefit from doing this.
-Make some good music. I know, it sounds weird, but you would be surprised what it can do for your career.
No need to thank me for these great ideas, just remember that I am available as a personal image consultant if you need any more help.
Awaiting your reply,
J-Roc
posted by J-roc at
3:26 PM
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